June 5, 2010. Today is the last day I stay In Ngadisari village, tengger region. I’m going home tomorrow after more than two months living in the village, studying and observing tenggerese’s life. Understanding what they think about themselves and where they are going in the future. Though there were suspicious eyes watching me when I first arrived, today I have many friends – real friends – that expect me to visit them again sometime in the future.
I read and I had heard that tenggerese are people who put honestly and kindness first for every single thing they do. More than that, there is nowhere else in the world where you live with people where none of them will harm you at any level. No one will take your belonging. There is no burglar, no pick pocket. Even when someone found the neighbor left the house with an open door, one will wait until the house owner come and make sure no one else enter the house. When one has trouble in his/her life, others will try to help. I saw when a half paralyzed guy tried to walk, everyone was taking care of him and tried to cheer him up. They are Hindus. The religion obliges its followers to believe “karma” - when you do bad things to the others, you will get the consequences later on. So better to do good things as life will treat you better.
In the village, you have no worry to be betrayed. No one will hurt your feeling. In contrary people will hold their feeling for your own interest. A few days before I left, it was a guy who put his interest on me though I have no interest at all on him. Actually I prefer other more good looking guys to escort me, not him. But all his friends supported him – including the guys that I prefer - and tried to set up a situation where I would spend most of my time with him, by escorting me wherever I go. With thousand of reasons I avoided him. If he were a guy from Jakarta, I would appoint my finger on his nose. Warn him to get off from my view. But I can’t do that there. Otherwise the whole villagers will recognize me as a cruel woman. Though for some aspects, I am.
When everyone is nice, is there any mechanism of punishment? No, they don’t need it. If a guy does a bad thing, he would be the topic of discussion. People will see him differently. Once the chief of village call the guy for an advice, it is the time he feels shame and loses his face. No one in tengger would like to lose their faces. They’d better committed suicide than losing faces. It is reported that a former chief of one village in tengger region committed suicide after being caught gambling.
When you deal with people who sincerely treat you well, there is no choice than treat them nicely with your sincere feeling as well. As a result, I feel that the whole villagers love me. It is great to have this feeling. A feeling to trust everyone, an assurance that no one will harm me. I see every single individual gives me a sincere smile, and I smile back to them. Everyone asks me to visit their houses, and once I come they will provide meals. Eating meal is a must to prove that you appreciate the house owners. Once I ate big meals three times in one evening. I had to do it though I felt that the rice had reached the upper level of my throat. I’m learning that for being nice I have to put other people’s feeling ahead from my own. Sounds like a soup opera where the leading role is naively nice to everyone. I hate soup opera but for the time being, I am the leading actress.
It was also a time when I stopped by due to heavy rain in Wonokerso village. I entered a house and joint the hostess at a fireplace. I tried to communicate but she spoke poor bahasa and I couldn’t speak the local language. We ended up sitting together in silence. Then her son came joining us. Again I tried to break the ice. He answered my questions with only short sentences. Then silence again. I asked to leave as the rain was stopping but they hold me by saying that it was still raining heavily. They liked my present. They wanted me to stay, but in silence. For a chatty person like me, being silence is a real torture.
Tenggeresses are living in harmony within their society. Everyone trusts everyone. No matter happen in another part of the world, who cares. My village is my heaven. Unfortunately this discourages young people to pursue higher education. Most of the villagers are elementary school graduated. Even people who went to universities, once they finished, they return back to the village again, to become farmers. Including the guy who put his interest on me - an illiterate guy who is drunk every day. My education, my job, my expected achievements and my future are the things beyond his imagination. In the village, there is almost no intellectual discussion. You would hardly hear any debate on politics or country’s economic condition. The most intellectual discussion I have ever heard were about selecting the best seed quality of vegetables and where to the get the best price to sell vegetable – tengger region is famous for vegetable productions. When they gather, they talk about funny things. One will make the best jokes that one could create. It was fun anyway – for certain period - being around by humorists. They do gossiping. Once you’re part of the society, people will watch every single move of you. So beware !
I mentioned about “drunk” earlier. They do consume alcoholic drink. In a cold place like that – more than 2000 m asl – they need alcoholic drink to warm themselves. During parties such as a wedding party, there will be unlimited flow of alcoholic drink to everyone, especially men. Drink as much as you can. They also use drink only from recognized brand. No experiment. Fortunately, they know when to stop. People who are drunk in public, will lose their faces in society. When they are drunk they don’t behave negatively. Just sit nicely or stay still and smoke cigarettes. One night, I walked through drunken people – more than a hundred people- to find a person. They stared at me only behind their cigarettes’ smoke and let me passed. Different to North Celebes and West Papua or perhaps in other places on earth where walking through 100 drunken people is similar to committing suicide. Party doesn’t have to be held during week end. Mostly during week days because each individual has different lucky day. After having fun in one evening, the next day people return to their daily routine. Farmers go to their fields, teachers and students go to schools, etc.
No wonder tenggerese prefer to stay forever in their villages. Every individual has – at least - a piece of land for farming. They regularly have money from vegetable productions. From tourists, young tenggerese are able to collect at least fifty thousand rupiah per day from tips as being middle men between tourists and tourism facilities eg. hotels, transportation, horse riding, etc. During peak season, they could even collect more than five hundred thousand rupiah a day. Where in the city, it is difficult to earn money, even for ten thousand rupiah per day. The easiness to earn money, unlimited flow of alcoholic drink availability and a feeling of trust that no one will hurt you. It is heaven. Everyone who lives in the cities wants to live like that. Lucky tenggerese. Except one thing : your brain would be frozen as life is too good and only a few have intention to use their brains.
